My Walks with Sugar

I'll be taking Sugar for her second walk in a little while. I look forward to taking her. We walk around the neighborhood where it's quiet, and most are still at work. My work of course is done inside my home.

I've lived in this neighborhood for close to 40 years. It's hard to believe. I almost moved away last fall but decided against it for the time. And since then I've realized how lucky I am to be where I am, in a location one can actually relax, and feel more in touch with nature. Yes, I have neighbors on all sides, but am situated in a way that I do have my privacy, yet we can all look out for each other, which we do.

I moved here in 1971, actually at the end of August. Married, with a two year old and six months pregnant with my second child, this was going to be our "starter" home. Except as the years passed, we found it easier to stay on, add on, and remain where we were. My house is considered tract housing, a small ranch house. We paid I think $20,000 for it. We added a two car garage, a family room, another full sized bath, a deck. The basement is finished. The yard is kept up by my neighbor, who does a fantastic job. He lives in the back so is always around to do whatever needs to be done. His son plays with the younger boys across the street. They often cut through my yard to visit each other's house. I don't mind. We have formed a community and we look out for each other.

Still, whenever I go out into my backyard, I envision how it once was. My neighbors to my right, the original owners of that house have passed on. I can still imagine Roger out in his garden, or building a windmill, or stocking up on wood, filling a special shed just for that purpose. I imagine him with my late husband, figuring out how to start and complete the latest project. Each holding a beer, kabitzing about the best way to do things.

Helen, Roger's wife loved bingo. She also loved her hot dogs, and knitting or crocheting.

Roger loved his special projects, like that windmill. I'm not sure if he ever really generated any electricity out of it.

Every summer Helen would holda tag sale. One time I participated in a neighborhood tag sale with Helen and her sister Jeannie. Both have passed on, joining Roger, and my husband.

I now walk around the neighborhood with Sugar. All the kids have grown, and have kids of their own.  It's all different. 

The years passed so quickly. And each generation will wonder how does time go by so fast like that, leaving behind only memories.

The above ground pool we once enjoyed is long gone. I did not plant a garden this year, although the ground is ready for it having been rototilled last week. I simply did not get around to it. Age has something to do with it of course. I conserve my energy now for those actitivies that I want to enjoy. Dancing being one of them which I'll do tonight.

My walks with Sugar gives me the opportunity to reminisce, reflect, and re-evaluate. As July 4th weekend approaches, I am reminded that it will be eight years that will have passed since losing my husband on that fateful day (July 6, 2002.) In the beginning of my grieving I was told eventually we get "over" such terrible tragedies. In a way I will agree. Yet, I have to warn we totally never get over those type of events in our lives that pretty much turn us upside down.

I'm sure that every day since that day I have at some point during any given day thought of what happened. The images don't disappear but become embedded into our psyche. Thirty-three years with someone does not disappear. Forgetting become an impossibility.

We go on. We make a new life. We create new memories. We can laugh again. We can experience joy again. Yet, in the quiet moments, such as taking a small dog for her walks we can be transported back in time, and even start to again enjoy those moments created by that past life.  Moments such as those have made us who we now are in the present.

Through death, through divorce, through an event that separates us from that person we had spent a lifetime with, it is the  memories that stay.

As a result, I think we appreciate more of what is in the here and now. We remember to show gratitude for when things go well, because we know how it can all go wrong and turn on a dime.

We value relationships better, and we become more patient with those who are now in our lives.

And why I look forward to my daily walks with my dog Sugar, and am more grateful and more appreciative of all that life brings to me.

This week will be a week of reflection for me of course as it has been since after 2002.

TWO REVIEWS FOR NO MORE SECRETS, NO MORE LIES

While surfing the net today, which I occasionally do to see if any new reviews are there for any of my books.  I came across two of them today.  Of course, seeing that I received five stars from one, and four stars from the other...I'm doing a snoopy dance.

I'm posting them here so that I can come back to this page and look at them, especially on those days when I may feel a bit discouraged, or down, or simply wondering if I should be doing something else.  Of course I know the answer.  At this stage in my life, I need to do those things I fully feel a passion for and that is creating complex plots, complicated characters, and stories where readers will find a satisfying ending.

This reviewer gave No More Secrets, No More Lies five stars!

Years ago, Sydney Morgan gave up on the only man she ever loved. After spending an entire weekend together, Sydney wasn't prepared to find out that the man she thought she knew, was in fact engaged to be married. Not waiting on an explanation, Sydney left him, her job, and disappeared. Her choices eleven years earlier weren't made just for her sanity, she had someone else to think about. While Sydney thought she was doing the right thing at the time, she is now haunted because the man she has continued to love is now one of her clients and he wants back into her life. What will he do when he finds out the lies she had to tell in order to keep her most prized possession safe?

Grant Sinclair is pleasantly surprised to find that his new financial advisor is none other than Sydney Morgan. When she left him eleven years ago, Grant was almost destroyed and thought to lick his wounds by marrying another, which didn't work. Grant is divorced now and when he sees Sydney again, he wants to take up where they left off, only Sydney isn't cooperating. Grant finally learns the reason for her subterfuge when he realizes that she is a single mother of a son. A son that seems to have been born nine months after their weekend together. A son that thinks his father is dead.

Will Sydney's lies be too much for Grant to bear? While she thought she was doing the right thing at the time, Sydney is tired of the lies and decides to tell all.

No More Secrets, No More Lies by Marie A. Roy is intensely emotional and often times just downright sad. Choices made by Sydney made me wince at times but I could relate to those same choices and was able to lend my support. Grant Sinclair made me a bit irritated in the fact that, while he never called Sydney in eleven years, he immediately wanted to pick up where they left off without first asking for any explanations as to why she disappeared. Have no fear, however, Sydney put him right in his place and that made me smile.

No More Secrets, No More Lies was a good read. I applaud Marie A. Joy for writing such a poignant novel. Fully able to relate to making choices alone, I found myself immersed in the story and sighed with satisfaction when finished. I think I have found another author to read and for that, I am happy!

Talia
reviewed for Joyfully Reviewed 

This reviewer gave No More Secrets, No More Lies four stars! 

Secrets have a way of revealing what you wished to stay hidden . . .

Sydney Morgan has just been given an account that could either make or break her career. She is determined to win GS Enterprises but she is totally unprepared when she discovers that GS's CEO is Grant Sinclair. Her past has come back to haunt her. Grant is the same man that she put out of her life ten years prior .... the same man who broke her heart ... the same man who is the father to her physically challenged son, Brian .... the same man who still sets her heart to racing. Will she have the courage to face Grant and reveal the secret she has kept locked away from him for so many years?
Grant Sinclair hasn't seen Sydney Morgan for ten years but she still has that same beauty that had captured his attention the first time his eyes met hers so many years ago. However he is saddened to see that those same eyes are now shadowed with guilt and doubt. What has happened to her? Will he be able to convince her to reveal the secrets that she has kept so well guarded? Will he be able to accept the truth if he does?
In NO MORE SECRETS, NO MORE LIES Marie A. Roy does an exceptional job in her development of her characters. It has been a very long time since I found myself growing so close to the book's characters. Her smooth poignant plot will stand up with the best in the romance industry. Books such as this one are hard to put down once read.

By Suzie Housley -MyShelf.com Book Reviewer

A New Toy for my PeekaPoo

A Thing for Dr. Oz

I finally had to admit to myself today while standing in line at a local Price Chopper that I may have "a thing going" for Dr. Oz. Then again so does probably a million or more other women (and some men) who watch his show every day.

Today when I noticed a woman standing behind me and staring at what I had put on the conveyor belt, particularly one of the items I realized she probably was not familiar with Baramundie which is a fish and in fact is what the package contained.

Baramundie is a white fish. Baramundie is what Dr. Oz recommends that we eat simply because it's one of the best fish to eat besides Salmon. One can eat just so much salmon. Baramundie is usually found in the frozen fish section in the fish department. You can Google it to find out more about it and the fact that it is an excellent source of Omega 3 fatty acids.

Getting back to Dr. Oz, I informed the woman what the package contained. I then shared with her why I buy it now because of Dr. Oz's recommendation. I also shared with her that Dr. Oz and I as well as my sister will share the same birthday this week. Her eyes lit up at the mention of Dr. Oz's name.

It was then I realized also that his show has greatly influenced what I now buy in any grocery store. Today I bought not only the Baramundie fish, but also raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, Shitake and Maitake mushrooms, sweet potatoes, veggie burgers as well as Smart Dogs, which look like hot dogs but are made from tofu. Also, spring greens, Benecol spread, Greek yogurt, a package of frozen vegetables as well as a package of frozne Edame beans. I did regress when I picked up a small container of Haagen Daz vanilla ice cream.

A special friend will be over later and we will enjoy a dinner comprised of the Baramundie fish, sweet potatoes, salad, and the ice cream for dessert. We will also enjoy a nice glass or two of a white wine...probably a Chardonnay.

I think TVshows like Dr. Oz and The Doctors (which I also faithfully watch each day_ teach us that we should be buying our groceries in a mindful fashion which can result in far better choices as far as nutrition.

Healthcare I guess will always be a "biggie" with me in terms of what it is doing to not only ourselves but our nation.

I read somewhere that during the "big" wars (WWI and WWII) when Americans needed to ration what they used and were eating less meat, as well as less sugary foods, and incorporating more of the bean dishes, and the soups that contain vegetables the incidence of cancer, heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure became lower. That is no coincidence.

Yet, today I spot customers in these stores filling carriages with sugar laden sodas, salty snacks, fatty meats, and highly processed foods that only aggravate any condition they may already have, or be the trigger in developing any of those conditions.

We are in essence merely "feeding tubes." Why are we careful what we put into our gas tanks. Why can't we be more careful of what we put into our own bodies? Each cell needs certain nutrients to thrive. It makes me wonder about a certain soda which actually disperses grease off a cement floor what that will do to us when we ingest it into our stomachs? Yet, many Americans feel they can not live without this drink. 

I would love to see classes and courses given that explain the digestive process, and what the body truly needs to stay healthy. Also, what foods will actually harm us in the long run, producing illnesses that are not only pushing healthcare costs to an all time high, but taking away from resources that can make our country a far healthier and productive country.

Anyway, getting back to Dr. Oz, I'm hoping more and more will watch his show, try to understand what he is trying to tell us in terms of what WE should be doing to maintain a healthy life style.

Meantime, later today I'm going to enjoy my Baramundie fish and all the trimmings!

My PeekAPoo Puppy

Too Fat to Fight

This post won't be about writing or my books. Today I came across this article. Here's a paragraph from that article.

A new report being released Tuesday says more than 9 million young adults, or 27 percent of all Americans ages 17 to 24, are too overweight to join the military. Now, the officers are advocating for passage of a wide-ranging nutrition bill that aims to make the nation's school lunches healthier.

Click HERE to read the rest of the article.

Perhaps the school curriculum should now include a course on nutrition and what kids should be eating. If we all took a more conscientious approach to what we put into our mouths at any given point in our day and night, and realize like any machinery, there are certain things we need to be healthy, then we will again produce young men and women who are healthy enough to join our armed forces.

This to say the least is embarrassing for this country. Our kids are now too fat to join an organization that is devoted to protecting us. Lord help us all!

Yet, when I see statistics telling me we are spending in healthcare every year 98 billion dollars in just the treatment of diabetes it makes me wonder. Is there a conspiracy between the healthcare system and the fast food chains to produce this state of affairs. Again to say the least this is embarrassing for all of us in this country.

We are indeed becoming a "sick nation." And it seems no one knows how to put the BRAKES on this rampage of disease that is basically caused by lifestyle and diet.

Yet, it all comes down to economics. Stop buying the soda--which adds absolutely nothing to the health of our bodies--and you put people out of jobs. Stop buying all that processed foods that can never provide all the nutrients whole unprocessed foods do into our bodies--and again you put people out of work.

It's a Catch-22 situation where we make the choice to be able to make the money to put food on to our table or we make money to pay the co-pays that go with those numerous visits to a doctor's office for diseases that are caused by our diets.

Education is the key to helping our children become healthy and fit so that if they want to join the armed forces they won't be rejected based on their overweight status.

Eating whole rather than processed foods will help. Portion control will definitely help. It is one reason why when I go out to eat I usually cut the portion in half or even more than half, and end up with two even three meals that week.

The information is out there on what is going to help us attain a good weight. Again, it is simple. Become aware of what you are doing to your body...which over time many lose perspective and actually become out of touch where they are in their diets.

The body is a machine. It does need certain foods to survive. It does not need the processed foods, or any quasi-food that adds absolutely nothing in terms of nutrients.

The body will utilize all the vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, and legumes you can feed it. When it comes to pastries, and soda, candy...basically all that sugar, all the body can do is turn it into fat storage which pushes the numbers up the scale.

Exercise is also a must. Our bodies were meant to move...and incorporating that every day is the key along with eating the correct foods the body can utilize will produce a well-oiled machine that our nation can be proud of once again.

A common sense approach to a healthy lifestyle and a healthy diet is needed more now than ever before because our healthcare is actually more of a security threat in terms of costs than anything we can incur from outside sources.

Who needs terrorists to destroy what we have? Just scoffed down those donuts, gulped down all that sugar laden soda, scarfed down the double burgers, and the extra serving of fries...and don't forget those milkshakes that hold more calories then anyone is allowed in a week. We don't need any terrorist to bring down this great nation. What we eat and the poor choices we make will do that for us.

Enough said. I'm out of here to take my PeekaPoo for her long walk!

NO MORE SECRETS, NO MORE LIES

NEW RELEASE DATE!

APRIL 16, 2010 at THE WILD ROSE PRESS


This is a story that is being reissued with a new publisher. When it originally came out at Novel Books Romance (no longer in business) NO MORE SECRETS, NO MORE LIES received a Four Star Review from ROMANTIC TIMES BOOK CLUB MAGAZINE.

Here are some other review sites that have reviewed this book:

THE ROMANCE STUDIO

FALLEN ANGEL REVIEWS

Class in Progress

Sugar Completed Puppy Obedience Class

Yep, she and I made it to all eight sessions. It was touch and go again, simply because Sugar has certain traits that could have worked against her graduating from this class, such as stubborness, lots of energy, a curiosity unmatched by many, and wanting to be the center of attention.

No dog was too small or too big for Sugar, she wanted to know them all. I compared her to the class clown, always vying for attention, and not paying attention to boot. But during those last two class sessions when Sugar actually began to sit, lay down, and stay in place, and when she did not touch the treat laid out in the aisles to the command "Leave it!" I knew. Sugar was going to make it through. And she did. She performed with the best of them, and proved that with persistence, perseverance, and lots of patience goals can be accomplished.

It has been touch and go so far with me and Sugar. I'm getting acquainted with her ways and in turn she's learning what to expect from me. It's a two way thing going on here. There are no winners or losers, just simply getting to know our limitations, our flaws, weaknesses as well as strengths and how far one can push the other.

Sugar is still in the puppy stages of development so I do give her some latitude. At the same time she needs to know her boundaries, and the fact that none of my shoes, sneakers, or sandals are any part of her own growing pile of chew toys.

Today we go to Petco to get more food and probably another chew toy or one that will be good for a game of pull and tug.

There are moments when I'm ready to load her into her carrier, plop it into the front seat of my car and head back to that puppy store telling them I must've not been in the right state of mind, and return her.

Those moments are more fleeting now. They only come when I find her discovering another electrical cord behind a sofa or chair, or dashing through the house with one of my sandals, or missing the poopie pad.

Yet she's someone to get up for in the mornings. Someone else to think about during the day and provide for her needs. I think of the long winter months ahead and surmise that Sugar's company is going to be a welcome plus in my life.

Where do writers get their ideas!

Everywhere! Anywhere! It can be a thought, a verse, a poem, an incident, or during a walk, a car ride, on an airplane in mid flight, on a boat, a cruise ship, or while doing dishes, or washing the bathroom floor, taking the dog out to do its thing, planting a garden, mowing the lawn, cleaning the garage, cleaning the basement, watching a program on TV or a movie on the silver screen.

Or it can happen while shopping in a grocery store.

That happened to me today when I stopped to pick up a few things like yogurt, coleslaw, rolls, and some milk. I spotted a man dressed in a black tank top and tan shorts. His jet black hair was worn short, but you could tell if he let it grow longer it would become thick and even unruly. He was tanned, the kind of tan that is earned not by sunbathing but by working outside. And he was very well built. So I'm guessing construction.

He glanced over at me. And I thought what a perfect specimen, and saw a character developing. I briefly returned the glance, and self-conscioudly slipped into another aisle, all the while peeking around the corner. He glanced again my way, and I pretended to be studying the contents on a can of cat food.

Finally, I knew I had to make my way to the cashier where he was now paying for his purchases. It's a small store and I had two choices. Get in the same line behind him, or go in the one at the right where a customer had a loaded cart.

I took a deep breath and placed my few items on the conveyor belt as he paid for his stuff, and then he left.

A brief moment in time. A lost opportunity.

Still, it triggered something inside my mind, and as I drove home I mentally heard a conversation going on between two women.
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"I just met the sexiest man," Janette told her roommate Nicole as she lined up the cartons of yogurt on the refrigerator shelf. "I didn't actually meet him, I spotted him."

"Tell me where that was so I can see if there's more like him." Nicole laughed. "It's the middle of a Sunday afternoon. Where could you meet someone like that anyway?"

"Becker's Foods." Janette smiled, closing the door. "And I'm wondering if maybe he does his shopping there every Sunday afternoon."

"Wow, you're serious."

"Yes, and I'm going back next week to find out if my hunch is true."

So will Janette go back? Will she meet up with this dark handsome stranger? And will this dark handsome stranger present an opportunity for Janette to live out a few fantasies?

My mind is already working on those scenarios and I can't wait to find out what happens.

Helping the Economy!

I do my best to help this stagnant economy. At least I think I do. On a fixed income consisting of a pension and a SS check I am still out there making purchases.

And I do it in the local stores in my area. I go to Mandee's. I go to Job Lot. I'm often seen at WalMart. I go to either Price Chopper, Stop and Shop, or the IGA's.

I figure every little bit helps. We get the things we need, and these businesses stay in business and pay their employees.

This is pretty much what it takes to keep any economy going, stabilizing it to the point that jobs can be created. When that happens, then we've got more people going into the workforce that coming out and who in turn are able to do what I'm doing, which is helping a stagnant economy.

Except at times people like me on that fixed income might use a helping hand in terms of a break in the pricing of these goods and services.

I went to a local HealthTrax facility to see if I could join at a reasonable price that would not seriously jeopardize my budgeted monthly expenses and put it at risk.

This is a facility that once housed tennis courts and held local tennis matches. It is a facility that my late husband frequented quite often, playing in these matches, as well as playing in tournaments that built him a solid reputation as a tennis pro.

I think the match that he would always remember is the one he played during a yearly tournament called the Ralph Strong Tournament where he and his partner John played against Ralph Strong (84) and his partner (50's.)

Bob and John were still in their 30's. Both avid and capable players they ended up losing the match and afterward expressing the fact that Ralph was a very consistent player and very seldom missed the ball as it came over the net.

Although I myself never became a competitive player, I can still hit a forehand, backhand, and overhand and get the ball in the right spot.

Needless to say the faciilty held good memories until this past Tuesday when I decided to go and see what specials they had going. And they did have a special going, as well as an open house. My granddaughter accompanied me and was excited at the prospect of her grammie becoming a member. For an additional fee I would have been able to bring her during school vacations.

In an earlier post I think I related the fact I once belonged to Gold's and when my healthcare costs went up, I had to cut out that monthly expense of $37. In fact every year as my healthcare cost creep higher, I try to cut down on something else.

But with the way the economy is at this point, in the back of my mind I thought just maybe I could get a really good deal and pay less than the $37. But alas, instead the cost even paying ahead turned out to be $41 a month, so an increase. Fixed incomes don't really allow for these increases.

Still I thought maybe I could come home and mull it over, go over my budget figures, see what I might be able to make this work. I told the "salesperson" this. That day they were willing to waive a $30 fee if I signed up right then and there. She then tells me to wait a second while she checks with her boss to see if this was the best deal they can give me. She comes back and tells me that if I wait until Friday to give them an answer, then they would have to charge me the $30 fee. I'm thinking "hard ball tactics" which grates against my soul in a way that puts me immediately on the defense.

Do they not see that all this looks like is that I'm penalized for wanting to think this over rather than sign a contract for close to $600. Then they're telling me that some insurances will cover the whole costs. Unfortunately, my insurance doesn't although they are in some program called GlobalFit where a discount can be given anywhere from 10% to 60%. This I've been given, a whopping 10%. Still the monthly fee is $41.

Three days later the phone periodically rings and it is the health facility calling. I don't plan to answer and am looking into another facility where the rates are low, though they don't offer as much as this first one.

Still, for me it's a place to go where I can get fit and socialize. It doesn't have to have all the bells and whistles. And hopefully this one will fit into my tightening budget, because I'm sure with the way things are going in this nation, what with obesity dangerously on the rise, my healthcare costs will continue to soar and I will be paying that ER visit for someone who has not healthcare insurance, but loves and mindlessly indulges in all that fast food at McDonalds, Burger King, and Pizza Hut.